With Drona Comes Rona

Now let me get this straight – Shah Rukh Khan and family attended the star studded Drona premiere. And I quote, said “My kids and I liked the film a lot”. Dude now this is diplomacy straight out-of-the-box because I watched the very damn film last night and it was downright boring. Okay maybe not that boring, just a wee bit better than…lets say Love Story 2050.

And this is not my opinion alone; we were a group of five four and each one of us felt like we were being zipped through bad versions of Harry Potter coupled with Amar Chitra Katha. Had it not been for the 12 dollars (Rs. 530) shelled out for the ticket and the sheer privilege of being the only ones in a 300 seater cinema hall – believe me you, I would have certainly walked out.

Its not that I am not fond of Abhishek Bachchan, just like apna Hindi film industry I feel this motherly bond towards him irrespective of the fact that he is much older. And I really wished for his Drona to kick oh-look-I-am-so-gorgeous, Krrish’s firmly toned butt. Especially when in Dhoom 2 Abby baby ended up looking like a chaukidar in comparison to Roshan baba’s golden locks, 6 pack torso and jelly-like legs.

But such was not to be.

Goldie Behl’s Drona is a 3 hour drag with never ending narration, typical Bollywood clichés, several production bloopers, below average acting skills and above all amateur graphics (barring a few).

You can have me go on and on…but I shall be kind and restrict myself to Top 3 most annoying Drona facts.

• Every time Drona finds himself failing against the evil magician all he needs to do is; stand stiff, look down for several seconds and then look up with Dharmendra’s kutte main tera khoon pee jaoonga expression plastered all over his face. Just like we hit the refresh button on our screens, and alls well again.
• And what’s up with Piggy Chops. I mean she is looking all fit and fine but why so much dusky mascara on the face? I am guessing the face whitening cream must have worked but only now Priyanka realized that black is the new white in Bollywood (Don’t believe me, ask Bipasha).
• What the f*** is the whole babuji crap?

Final words – Watch it on the big screen ONLY if you are looking for something to thrash.