More than the post I found your comments very informative and in some ways heart felt.

Hope you will continue to write on such topics more often.

Keep it up.

In fact many television shows/documentaries on Homosexuality refer to the Gay culture as the “Queer World” and/or “LGBT”. However the term LGBT technically stands in-correct since it doesn’t represent other (non-publicized) sub-communities within the larger Homosexual framework.

Arzan – As for the core issue, well I think you got that part wrong. My posts on the concerned topic (till date) have never been about, for example, a homosexual man/woman’s coming to terms with their own sexuality. They are mostly centered on the Indian society’s perspective and their behavior towards those who do not follow “norm” sexual lifestyle.

And in my opinion you are miss-representing my words by stating that I am categorizing it all as “simple problem” – I for one would never say or act in such immature fashion.

Agreed, each case has its own merit and should be dealt separately however in the Indian sub-context, “acceptance” and “no right to ones’s sexual choices” by the society at large is the core (common) problem experienced by the entire Gay (Queer) community.

I hope you will find the above reply satisfactory, if not, then frankly there is nothing more I can say that could make you think otherwise. Plus I don’t think it even matters, as long as we are on the same side and that is “Live and Let Live”.

Incidentally, our conversation gave me a lot to think about as well and examine my own pre-conceived notions. I still maintain that it is very human to be curious. I don’t think you are a hypocrite at all, especially since you are willing to hold up your own actions and thoughts against the standard of your opinions…and even admit that they don’t always match. Some of our ideas are on ‘default’ mode given our conditioning. But these can always be changed when one thinks about it.

Good post and I’m looking forward to the more detailed follow-up!

From the same wikipedia link, the article states

‘Because of the context in which it was reclaimed, queer has sociopolitical connotations, and is often preferred by those who are activists, by those who strongly reject traditional gender identities, by those who reject distinct sexual identities such as gay, lesbian, bisexual and straight, and by those who see themselves as oppressed by the heteronormativity of the larger culture. ”

That is exactly my point.

Just say it the way it is..Gay, Lesbian, Hetero, Transsexual, or Bi. At least thats the way we all do in NYC !!!!

An analogy is Prostitue v/s Commercial Sex Worker. We are all mature adults and dont need to be so politically correct.

And yes……… what is the core issue. Is it coming to acceptance with one’s feeling about one self or one’s feeling about someone else.

Why are you trying to make it all a simple problem. I think each one has its own merit and should be dealt with seperately if you really are intending to do that.

Everyone is biased in some way or the other, and I think it is quite natural. Some of us accept it, some “justify” it under the guise of “personal preference” (and right to freedom of speech, Ayn Rand and gods know what else) and some refuse to accept the idea that they could be biased.

People in the first category usually don’t talk much about these biases; in the second, they might occasionally criticize others; in the third one, there is no end to their lectures in morality, ethics and humanity. IMO, it is this last category of people who are the real hypocrites.

To derive from the title of your blog, I doubt whether you fall in the third category.

There, I have jumped to a conclusion! Heh.. might revise it after your next post though!

“I don’t think a sex change is the same as being “queer”. BTW, you should use a better term”

Well, I am surprised to hear something like this from someone who has spent so many years in a city like NYC. In my opinion the word “Queer” is an appropriate word – be it in relation to the post and/or its acceptation socially.

When I talk about “Queer Community” – I am not only referring to Gay men and lesbians but also transgender, asexual, etc. basically all those who do not follow the “normal” sexual pattern as prescribed by the society we live in. Agreed, traditionally the word “Queer” does not reflect the intensity it deserves, however it is well accepted and recognized term globally. And this I say after reading multiple books on the related topic such as “Because I have a Voice: Queer Politics in India”, “Gandhi’s Tiger and Sita’s Smile: Essays on Gender, Sexuality and Culture” along with my first hand interaction with those involved in campaigning for Queer rights and acceptance in our country.

As for the issues being non-related, well I certainly don’t think so. As you pointed out yourself, the social implications for both – a Gay man or a Transsexual – are similar and since my post (and previous posts) is a take on the society’s (general) point of view – I believe the core issues are related in more than one pattern.

TO get back to the point, a sex change is coming to terms with your inner feelings about yourself. While being gay is more about the affection and attraction you feel towards others….be they your own or opposite sex. And since the birth of time it has been taken for granted that one should be attracted to the opposite sex ONLY, we have a situation where people dontn fit that “RULE”.

As much as your observation is astute, i think there are two completely different issues….both with kinda similar social implications, but different nevertheless. Probably your next post is about that.