*Warning – An emotional rant, in all probability it won’t interest you so kindly skip it; using this space because I have to puke it all out. Just like my favourite song…
It may sound absurd
but don’t be naive-
Even Heroes have the right to bleedI may be disturbed
but won’t you concede?
Even Heroes have the right to dreamIt’s not easy to be me. [Link]
It’s in my nature not to get effected with what others have to say about me. And I think my rough schooling days have a lot to do with it. I am also not the sort who wears emotions on her selves and exhibits them on drop of a hat (okay agreed, topic of Salman Khan maybe an exception to this rule) – no wonder time and time again, I get told-off by friends and family members to loosen up a bit. But as they say “some habits die hard” and frankly I am quite comfortable with my rigid self.
However things take a different turn when people very close to your heart point out those aspects of your character which you either thought never existed or preferred to ignore (more like what you don’t see, doesn’t hurt). And this is the very reason as to why I seriously hate getting emotionally dependant on another because unfortunately I am also the sort to drag everything else in my life down the drain if even one relationship is in turmoil.
And here are two very good examples of the above – so much for a New Year start.
Conversation with the Ex.
Ex – (Laughing tone in the voice) You so much remind me of that Anshuman guy.
Me – Anshuman, who? (Though I precisely knew who)
Ex – Silly! That fellow from Jab We Met. The guy Kareena dumps for Shahid.
Me – Okay.
Ex – Seriously, you are so much like him. Only realizing your mistake once you have lost it all but never truly appreciating when you were in control.
Me – Hmm…..
Ex – No really Saku. No wonder you lost me.
SMS from a so-called close friend.
Close Friend – You know you are a Fair Weather Friend. Look it up online to know what it means.
For the benefit of those who aren’t aware, it means…
A friend who is only a friend when circumstances are pleasant or profitable. At the first sign of trouble, these capricious, disloyal friends will drop their relationship with you.
Wow.
Moral of the story – Stick to my rule with all honesty; be rigid and refrain from indulging in emotional associations. They are so not worth it.
Comments
16 comments | Add your comment »
Sneha
Jan 9th, 2008 at 7:11 am | #
Well, if this is what your ex has to say than be assured that he indeed wasn’t worth it. Ditto about the close friend.
IdeaSmith
Jan 9th, 2008 at 8:12 am | #
If it were easy to be you, then everyone would be Sakshi and you wouldn’t be special to anyone. But you are. To a lot of people who tell you that and to some who don’t but know it anyway.
asuph
Jan 9th, 2008 at 10:07 am | #
Value judgments are very subjective when they’re about person. Sometimes our best of actions will be interpreted wrongly by even close people. At such times it helps to introspect and try to see if that perception can be corrected. Over the years, I’ve realized that misunderstanding are not worth losing friends over. If, after trying to clear the misunderstanding, the perception remains, then there is not much one can do. I know how much the second comment hurts. But trust me, it helps to talk things out, especially with close friends. Communication is such a complex thing that it can easily go wrong.
As for the first conversation, all I see is conceit from the other party. Why do you want to take it to heart? Unless you think there is a grain of truth in what he’s saying. You’re the best judge.
Closing all doors doesn’t make you safe from heart-breaks (of either kind). When in doubt remember the golden lines: “this too shall pass”. It does, trust me.
regards,
asuph
Preman
Jan 9th, 2008 at 12:38 pm | #
Sorry but have to say, the picture adds so much more weightage to your words.
As the guy above said “this too shall pass”.
Gaurav
Jan 9th, 2008 at 3:44 pm | #
Cheer up Saks, watch a Salman movie.
Broom
Jan 9th, 2008 at 4:58 pm | #
Coming out of my self-imposed exile to say, “Dil pe mat le yaar.”
And thank heavens he’s your ex! That was a really mean thing to say.
Saakshi O. Juneja
Jan 10th, 2008 at 8:19 am | #
Sneha – No re, won’t lie…they both are/were worth it.
IdeaSmith – Thanks, hon.
Asuph – I guess at times its not even about mis-understandings, its has to do with taking a relationship for granted…so much so we refuse to understand the other party even when you know they are not be blamed. And at times “external factors” also have a big role to play. But I totally agree with you…”there is nothing that cannot be talked out” especially when it comes to close relationships.
As for your question “Why do I take it to the heart”…well it is the matter of the heart after all.
Plus there maybe a bit truth in it but then in my case even “ego” of both the parties also played an important role.
Anyway thanks a ton for this comment and I do really mean it. (And hopefully, one day you will realize that “this” blog isn’t one of the wrong ones you have been reading lately
)
Preman - Yup I know.
Gaurav – I am trying. Thanks…and yes, Sallu does help.
Broom – Babes, dil ka mamla hai re, kya karoon!
asuph
Jan 10th, 2008 at 9:50 am | #
Sakshi, You’re welcome.
Actually about the “wrong blog” comment (you know where
), I owe you an apology, for the wrong conclusions. Although I still think that mixing those two issues in one blog was a grave (tactical) error on your part, once you have clarified, I don’t see the point of continuing with assuming you meant something else. (That’s always been my stand, ain’t it? The circle is complete, kind of).
And get back to your spirits soon. Ye isme kuch maza nahin hai. I cannot take potshots at your blogs while you’re down
.
regards,
asuph.
Neeti
Jan 10th, 2008 at 5:44 pm | #
Hey,
Though I know very little about you (from reading your blog i.e.)
noone deserves to put up with such nonsense from any person (ex or some long lost friend)-I’d say good riddance to such people. If they believe the world needs their character certificate, they’ve some serious thinking to do…
Hope you don’t stay down and out… Cheer up babe…
Saakshi O. Juneja
Jan 11th, 2008 at 12:46 pm | #
Asuph – Yes, boss. How can I deny you this pleasure especially when you have been so nice (for a change).
Neeti - Thanks yaar.
Sakshi fan
Jan 11th, 2008 at 2:31 pm | #
Sakshi ,
Give me address of your Ex. Nobody can say like that to sakshi & get away with it.
I really mean it
Your Bro from NG
Arti Honrao
Jan 11th, 2008 at 9:21 pm | #
I would say that your ex is in fact trying to convince himself that you did not deserve him instead of it being other way round. Though I do not know what the issue might have been, I can smell that he is the losing party here.
As far as your friend is concerned … shame on that friend.
I remember seeing your picture on your blog long back when I had first visited here. It spoke volumes and it did not say anything even close to what your so called friend says about you.
Perhaps you are right, sometimes it is better to be rigid.
GBU
Arti
Amrita
Jan 12th, 2008 at 6:45 am | #
This is why I try not to speak to my exes [well, except for two and they're both exceptional people who wouldnt say lame stuff like No wonder you lost me.]. I dont know what the context was for both these conversations but at a certain point, you have to draw a line with some people. Voice of long experience speaking, please listen.
Smooches!
Saakshi O. Juneja
Jan 12th, 2008 at 7:42 am | #
Bro from NG – Bade Bhaiya, mein apna kaam khud nipta leti hoon. Anyway thanks for the offer.
Ariti – Thank you babes.
Amrita – I too believe that; its impossible to be friends with the exes but this one too is from “exceptional” category. As for the friend, she is wonderful and I am sure didn’t mean it from the heart.
And yes, madam how can I not listen to you. Smooches to you too.
the mad momma
Jan 16th, 2008 at 8:27 am | #
Exes are ex for a good reason
Brad
Jan 18th, 2008 at 4:36 am | #
Hmmm…OK.
Are you saying that the words of your ‘friends’ have a tint of truth in them
Being ‘rigid’ and ‘emotionally insensitive’ and ‘emotionally non-dependent’, Alright bebe, why are you trying to mime me now! But humor apart, what’s the fun if you are not a bit of all these? You might as well be a stone that is kicked around by people, c’mon you are insensitive and you wouldn’t feel a thing! Unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way, does it!?
You wouldn’t want people’s words to dictate who you are; so what if some nincompoops tell you something that you don’t like (be it the truth) that shouldn’t compel you into metamorphosizing into some thing else!
…and you thought only you could rant!