Performance Appraisals And Their True Meanings

Great Presentation Skills – Able to bullshit

Good Communication Skills – Spends lots of time on phone

Work Is First Priority – Too ugly to get a date

Active Socially – Drinks a lot

Quick Thinking – Offers plausible excuses

Careful Thinker – Won’t make a decision

Aggressive – Obnoxious

Uses Logic On Difficult Jobs – Gets someone else to do it

Expresses Themselves Well – Speaks English

Exceptionally Good Judgment – Lucky

Keen Sense Of Humor – Knows a lot of dirty jokes

Career Minded – Back Stabber

Loyal – Can’t get a job anywhere else