Indian Cricket Team looking for Alternate Profession

Tendulkar clean bowled by Nel

We lost another match. So!

We lost another match miserably! So what’s the big deal yaar.

The South African team smacked the Men in Blue way below the belt and that too in all departments - batting, bowling and fielding.

The way we are proceeding (or should I say declining) towards the World Cup, it would be best that the Indian team withdraws from the tournament. And thereby not cause any sort of embarrassment to themselves and us.

Instead, I feel its time that some of the known-players from this loss-making team start looking for alternate profession and not-so-controversial future.

For example:

Sachin Tendulkar - Can give medical seminars on ‘Tennis Elbow’ and how to emerge from such dreaded physical disability. Plus he could also start a consulting firm dealing with matters regarding importing of ‘expensive cars’ and how to avoid being taxes on them.

Rahul Dravid - The Indian captain is most suited for the ‘Finance and Banking’ field; thanks to his dependable personality. Since he is already a brand ambassador for ‘Baroda Bank’, maybe they will offer him a full-time job.

Mahindra Singh Dhoni - No guessing here, this fella is most likely to succeed in the ‘Hairstyle modeling’ industry. Maybe a profession as a permanent barber would work well for him. He could probably join Harbhajan Singh’s hair saloon in Punjab.

Virendra Sehwag - I say, he should offer his ‘balding head’ to companies experimenting with ‘hair extensions’, ‘hair weaving’ and the like. Maybe not too much money but atleast there are chances of him getting some hair back.

Harbhajan Singh - Well Bhaji baby already has his future set with his up-coming chain of hair-saloons. But he could also try his hand at Punjabi movies, since he has the expertise of ad modeling.

SK Raina - This guy needs to go back to school and get completed with his education.

Mohammad Kaif - He should consider a profession as a masseur. With his pair of firm and safe hands, this is an ideal field for him.

Zaheer Khan - He would do well by joining a firm which settles caters to people with Long Term Disability. With his history of cricket-related injuries, he could become their highest-selling agent.

Ajit Agarkar - Now this dude can earn millions with his cricket formula. He could teach up-coming players - how to stay within the national team even when not deserving.

This is what I could come up with. Do you have any suggestions to help these guys or the players I have missed out from the list?